So um...

Marilyn Manson, what the hell do you think you're doing to Lewis Carroll?

YOU'RE SO TINY I WANT YOU.

from the looks of it, we're in for a rough week. ready? set. go.

My secret wish is to someday participate in San Jose Bike Party.

feeling listless

yes. that is me. obviously. can't you see it?

Things Learned Today:

1. How to write a Letter to the Editor,

2. That you should NEVER EVER use tester products at makeup counters because they're just teeming with bacteria and other yucky stuff,

3. That I just inhaled 41g of sugar in the form of an innocuous can of Pepsi,

4. That procrastination is FUN. But will come back to bite me in the ass, I'm sure, by the end of this week.

I get paid soon

so in premature celebration, I now have a NetFlix account! Hooray!

8:52 a.m., rainy day in Sacramento

I'm starting the morning off with a mug of green tea, working my way slowly up to coffee (probably). It's a rainy day, which confused me given the humidity and shorts+tshirt weather of the past few days, but that's how Spring works, I guess! This quarter's catching up to me in a very real, very frightening way. WHEN WILL I HAVE TIME TO FINISH EVERYTHING? WHO EVEN KNOWS? It's going to be one of those fit-everything-in-at-the-last-moment quarters, which is pretty much every other one.

I need to write more. And read more. And maybe return those overdue book(s) to the library. Oh dear.

I am so behind on National Poetry Month I'm probably not doing this anymore for realzy, but here's a poem!

How To Hold Your Breath, According to David Blaine

I. Hyperventilate

I am drowning in a sea made of salt, and

when I touch my lips to the surface

I realize that it is raining salt.

Grains hitting skin, grating -- think sandpaper

on an eyelid, cats licking newborn babies to death.

Short, spasmodic breath, trying to catch

the spaces in between mineral downpour.

II. Practice

Breathe until the lungs bleed,

breathe to a seam -- then burst it.

Breathe so that it doesn't feel

like an action forced, like pushing

a small rubber ball out of a throat.

Watch the way fish do it, opening

and closing their bloody mouths

with such glass-eyed lack of concentration,

taking in water and air like they'll never die.

I can taste blood and salt, feel air

pressing, shoving, and I want to -- I want to

take this exhaustion and fill balloons with it.

Fill cups and geometric cones.

Fill chests until they hurt, and keep going.

III. Go Limp

When all else fails, play dead.

Let that sea of salt claim what it owns.

BOOOO

Terrible allergies and I'm out of frozen grapes. There's the kicker.

yum.

PICNICKING WEATHER HAS OFFICIALLY RETURNED. I'm so pleased, now if only I could find some extra time in my day to fill with frolicking!

It's way beautiful outside. That means: inhaler + nasal spray + zyrtek + sunglasses + emergency eye drops. I dream that one day I will be able to go out into nature without all of these precautions, but I'm pretty certain that's just wishful thinking. LE SIGH.

I have to say...

Nothing makes you lose faith in yourself and in humanity at large quite like having to type up and format dozens of people's archived tweets. IF I HAVE TO PUT THE PHRASE "IN DA HAWWOUS" IN A SPREADSHEET ONE MORE TIME, I DONT KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA DO.

This.

Isn't.

RIGHT.

anywayyyysss. professionalism, come back. social media, go away (I realize the hypocrisy of this statement, as I type it into my blogspot, but I mean fb/myspace/TWITTER and the like).

ONE MORE THING:

I know it's a little early, but does anyone have any brilliant ideas for Mother's Day presents? I'm trying to come up with something brilliant and/or cheesy beyond reason.

LIFE RIGHT NOW:

So I'm super stressed out what with school + work + potential post grad unemployment + lack of sleep + UGH COMMUTING TO WORK + selling my soul to the devil for $10/hr BUT here are some good things that I'm trying to keep in mind:

1. OMG GLEE IS BACK. DID YOU HEAR ME? GLEE. IS. FUCKING. BACK ON THE AIR. I'm gidddyyyyy with excitement. Give me some of that Sue Sylvester sass! And QUINN. OH BEAUTIFUL QUINN.


2. I am rereading that one Lawrence Raab poem to try to nudge at any poetic inclinations I have within me -- "Sweetheart, put down your flamethrower. You know I've always loved you." still kills me. Every time!


3. I actually do like PR. Surprisingly. I've found something that I wouldn't mind doing forever! (or at least for a long while...)


4. I'm enjoying Monday night dinners at my apartment :). I love you guyz, you know who you areeee.


5. DAILYPUPPY.COM. Only right to check it every day.


6. Another blog recommendation, does anyone out there read "Cup of Jo" (joannagoddard.blogspot.com) regularly? She posts such pretty things, that preggers former blogger from Glamour.com. It's a true guilty pleasure.


7. AND THIS :)...

Most disturbing spam email subject line ever:

"IT'S JUSTIN BIEBER'S WORLD... WE JUST LIVE IN IT."

I almost miss the Viagra ads/ Nigerian 419 scams.

I never thought I'd be on a website called "Meat Trade News Daily," not even for work.

april poem 1

boy am i behind on poetry month! ...

poem 1

so say you are afraid, running through a spring forest,

branches glistening with the light of salt and sugar.

dense, dense leaves and your necklace catching on a branch,

pearls rolling across the moss-covered floor, delicately

hardened beautiful things, like you like you.

you are a good girl, crinoline skirts and pink fingernails,

leaving parts of yourself in beads and pearls,

the sharp stones left to stab the paws of running creatures,

the pearls lodged in their wet dark throats.

My brother on Katy Perry: "She looks hella old. Like she was a stay at home mom during WWII and then had to go work in the factories to build airplanes."

HAGGARD.

funereal and tired

Getting ready for the official end of mourning for my grandfather. It's three years after the death in Vietnamese culture, so all of the aunts and uncles from Canada are in town. It's more celebratory than anything -- lots of eating, loud conversation, cheerful reminiscence. Even going to the grave is never a sombre affair. Speaking of which, schedule for today: grave -> family lunch -> memorial mass -> dinner -> prayer service -> homework?!!!

Oh dear. In any event, I feel rather severe in all black.

:)

happyface forevs.

A British university will soon be the first to offer a Masters degree for Vampire Literature.

No FUCKING way. TWILIGHT WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!

This quarter's going to be much busier than I anticipated, but I feel like it's the right step to take -- working half time and concentrating on that, I mean. I'm really excited about my internship even though it's already exhausting me. The corporate world is so funny. I mean, the world of corporate communications, I guess. Anyway, I'm just a little peon running around packaging media clips and picking up boxes from Kinkos. It's funny to see the difference between working for a public institution (the city) and a private firm, because people are much more productive and hardworking, but there's so much more leeway (with personal vices) in the office. I mean, there's one of those wine fridge things in the office kitchen.